Three Ways You’re Not Off The Hook

Well, you really bungled that up big time. But it’s in the past, right? No one remembers? Everything’s back to normal? Don’t worry about it? Wrong. Here’s how you’re not off the hook.

1. Shaming Glances - You see how they look at you out of the corner of their eyes. The judging squints. The accusatory leering. They’ll never really forgive you. And groveling just makes it worse; trust me.

2. You’re Living In An Abandoned¬†Circuit City¬†- After “it” happened, you got kicked out of your apartment. Now you’re all alone and living in an abandoned Circuit City.

3. John Stossel Is Following You - Everywhere you go, this guy pops up. Yesterday, you were at Rite-Aid just buying all your meds, when John Stossel thrust a microphone in your face and demanded an explanation. This guy is relentless.

-Hoover Shoats